But regarding Ian's food snobbery, do not kid yourselves that you'll get the time to eat much of anything, except a bite of cake. Even at a sit-down reception, everyone is there because of the two of you and there will be constant conversational demands. The dress is for you, and the pictures are for you both, but any kind of reception is all about your families and friends.
I've helped relatives throw potluck weddings, and they all turned out fine. The main tip I'd have for you, aside from the signup sheet, is to consider portions. If you're feeding over 100 people, the typical "potluck" or "family reunion" size recipe won't feed everyone. If you're getting a side of beef, have more than one person bring potatoes (either the same type, or one 5lb tray of mashed, one of roasted, some double-baked, etc).
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But regarding Ian's food snobbery, do not kid yourselves that you'll get the time to eat much of anything, except a bite of cake. Even at a sit-down reception, everyone is there because of the two of you and there will be constant conversational demands. The dress is for you, and the pictures are for you both, but any kind of reception is all about your families and friends.
I've helped relatives throw potluck weddings, and they all turned out fine. The main tip I'd have for you, aside from the signup sheet, is to consider portions. If you're feeding over 100 people, the typical "potluck" or "family reunion" size recipe won't feed everyone. If you're getting a side of beef, have more than one person bring potatoes (either the same type, or one 5lb tray of mashed, one of roasted, some double-baked, etc).