I confess, I do think the wedding party at a restaurant with people welcome to come is tacky, but I'm having a hard time articulating why. It sort of feels two-tier to me, like there's the wedding party who are the "official" party, and then people should show up like party crashers. Not to mention, for a restaurant that could cause major hassles; having a large group already and then a bunch of separate groups all at the same time taking over their restaurant, not all of whom necessarily have reservations. I'd be happier not knowing the wedding party was doing something specific and fending for myself.

OTOH, I am also a fan of you doing what works best for you - it's your wedding, after all, and the person who needs to be happy is you.

When my sister's best friend got married she had her ceremony at noon (due to church scheduling) and her reception at 7pm. The time in between was used for pics and I believe the entire wedding party went out to eat lunch, but they also got completely smashed. So that's a down-side to splitting them up by too wide a time margin. :)